Blessings this Week: 09.30.2016 Edition

The bumble bees are moving slower now, just as my life seems to speed right up. 

Today was my last day at work, officially, and the two-ish weeks before we leave seem so short already.

So I count.

Because when I count blessings, time seems to slow for those moments of gratitude, and I remember that I'm loved by One who isn't bound by time.

How Should a Christian Vote? : part 1

Within five minutes of logging in to Facebook, I'm ready to curl up in a big fuzzy blanket and hide away for a while. Like, until Christmas.

Scrolling through my  newsfeed wears me out and makes me sad. The wealth of information out there makes my soul feel poor. The world feels so... hopeless.



I'm not sure if you noticed, (ha), but there's a presidential election coming up.

It feels... different, doesn't it?

I am old enough to remember several presidential elections, and old enough to have voted in a few, but still... this election seems different.

For one thing, both of the major party candidates are totally despised by a significant portion of the population. Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are two of the most controversial candidates of all time- complete opposites in terms of policy in almost every way. Apparently, no matter who is elected, about half of the population will be moving to Canada.

Blessings this Week: 09.23.2016 Edition

The days are quickly flying by and I'm marking off the days in my calendar and realizing that in only six short days, I'll be done working at Camp.

And it's a little surreal, and a little anxiety-inducing, but I'm leaning in hard and trying to remember the One who has it all well in hand, even when I feel like everything is out of control.

Replacements

As I write this, I'm sitting across the office from the woman who is taking my place.

She's literally taking my place today- sitting at my desk, behind my computer. I sit across the room, notebook in hand, waiting for her to ask a question about the task she'll soon be able to do with her eyes closed.

It's just a little weird, you know?

I'm working myself out of a job. For the next two weeks, I'll be training in "my replacement," a delightful lady with a nice loud laugh who will hopefully fall as much in love with my job at Camp as I did.

I feel a little lost. For the past nearly four years, I've been so needed. Sometimes even more needed than I'd like to be.

And at this very moment, the new office lady is taking care of something that I didn't even teach her how to do yet, and I'm feeling... unneeded.

It's weird.

But aren't we all kind of involved in training our "replacements?"




When we began this relationship with Christ, we also signed up for a life of pouring into others. Into our families, our friends, the kids we encounter, the little lives entrusted to us, the people we influence each day.

We lean into His Kingdom, into His purposes for each of us, and along the way, we get the awesome opportunity to start a ripple- to teach the next generations, to encourage and support people who will go on to do big things.

We train up someone else (or many someone else's) before we move on to the next step in this adventure of an abundant life God has in store for us.

I'm leaving this place in good hands, in capable hands, in the hands of someone who will take this job and this Camp and be instrumental in progress and growth, while also doing a lot of growing within herself (just as I have).

I'm starting to feel unneeded here, because I'm so needed somewhere else. 

It's weird, but it's also pretty affirming. A passing of a baton, not so I can go hit the sidelines and rest, but so that I can veer off on a new path, getting a new baton to pass along.

It will be so good, because it's what He has planned for me.

Let me work myself out of this job, God, and keep this place in good hands. Let me be worthy of this new calling You have in store for me, and even now, prepare me to go. 

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Anger : what it says about me, and how two questions make all the difference

I found myself breathless as I hung up the phone.

I could hardly believe the words that still echoed in my ears.

I was angry. Very, very angry. 

A simple mistake on my part led to a tongue-lashing that set my heart pounding fast and plummeted me into self-doubt. I choked out some excuse to the office assistant and headed to my husbands office and privacy so I could cry.

And cry I did.

And then, because my husband happened upon his very upset wife when he came back to get a start on his paperwork, I cried and also vented my anger to him in short, loud, furious bursts.

"How dare she say that to me?"

"I just can't do this anymore!"

"How could someone be so inconsiderate?!"

"I'm only human! What do they expect of me!?"

Blessings this Week: 09.16.2016 Edition

I begin our weekly blessings post with a story.

A dog story.

On Saturday, our dog was not acting like his happy self. He was mopey, not terribly excited to see us, eating slowly (not at all typical for him), and he was walking and sitting funny. He got worse as the weekend went on, and by Monday, I was sure we were going to have to put him down.

To the vet we went- and an exam and a painkiller pill later, Bear was back to his happy self.

And now I've been taking seven million pictures of him, reminding him that he's my big handsome boy, taking long walks, and most of all, appreciating all those funny habits of his that make me smile.

Sometimes it takes a storm to really show the beauty of a sunset. (Cheesy, but true.)

Counting blessings is like that. Sometimes, in the hardest seasons, we find the most beauty.

Unnamed Summer : and some news.

Whew.

The leaves are (already) starting to fall, the morning dew is cool on my feet, and my office is strangely quiet.

Summer is over.

Forging a New Trail : being renewed through identity in Christ

We're riding a four-wheeler to the end of our pasture when I see it.

A simple evening ride, relaxing the shoulders, breathing deep, listening to the wind through the long grass that we still haven't bothered to mow. These moments are ones for which I'm trying to make intentional room in the middle of all the busy- eating peaches on the porch, an extra moment to notice how the light spills over the floor, an evening ride with my husband through the land that I'm still a little shy to call "mine."

We turn to head back home, and I notice.

Blessings this Week: 09.09.2016

This week has gone by like... like it included a holiday weekend, no work on Monday, and lots of activity. 

So it went fast. 

And I'm reminded, once again, that life moves quickly and if I focus only on the to-do lists and the plans and crossing out boxes on my calendar, I just might miss the actual "life" part of life. 

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Integrity : living in honesty by clinging to identity

The headlights cut through the dark as we headed home. It was late, but that was okay.

I was still bubbling from the evening.

Energized by the conversation, my extroverted, albeit somewhat socially awkward, self was far from tired, even though it was way past my bedtime. I’d told a funny story at our couples small group, and it brought lots of laughter. Making people laugh, people I didn’t know well, brought me so much happiness. I flung out another silly anecdote, and that one hit home with the group, too.

Now, on the way home, I smiled at the memory of the evening. A successful night.

My husband drove quietly next to me, and in the light of a passing car, I saw his expression. He was unhappy.

But why? We’d just had so much fun! What could he possibly be upset about?

“What’s wrong?” I asked, almost put out that he was spoiling a nice night.

He recounted one of the funny stories I’d told, adding, “But I didn’t say that. You lied. And it wasn’t nearly that dramatic. Why did you lie about it?”

Blessings this Week: 09.02.2016

And just like that, September rolls in and marks the easing into Fall.

These transition times can force us into a noticing again. Suddenly I'm reminded that the summer is waning and the days are getting shorter and I'd better find the summertime blessings before they're gone.

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